


Deep in the forest

by mywasteddream



Series: Turning Point Series [3]
Category: Arashi (Band)
Genre: AU, Angst, suicide theme
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-02-04
Updated: 2015-02-08
Packaged: 2018-03-10 11:14:20
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 4,868
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3288263
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/mywasteddream/pseuds/mywasteddream
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Since last year, Nino had been visiting this town quite frequently. The Nino that came to this town for the first time was not the same with the Nino that was currently sipping on his coffee. Nino that Jun saw then was dim and ghastly.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. The Lone Customer

"J, I want coffee~!!" was what he said as soon as he entered the door. His voice sounded whiny compared to the happy sound of the welcome chime. Nino strolled towards one of the stools and slumped himself on the table. "I want coffee...."

"Another new game?" Jun calmly pour a cup of freshly brewed coffee and put it between reach of the small figure at the table.

The clump of hair shook. "No, I was up waiting to sell my stock in Brazil and Europe."

Jun sighed. He never knew whether Nino said the truth or not. He did not even know what Nino did for living. He did not seem to have a normal job because he came and go as he pleased to that town. Nino said he had an apartment about an hour drive away from there, but his car had Chiyoda-ku plate number - a black Mercedes SUV, something that did not quite match last year's Uniqlo clothes he wore most of the time. 

Since last year, Nino had been visiting this town quite frequently. The Nino that came to this town for the first time was not the same with the Nino that was currently sipping on his coffee. Nino that Jun saw then was dim and ghastly. 

 

The first time he met Nino, Masaki was visiting his parents back in Chiba. It was a quiet working day and the autumn leaves had almost disappear. Tourist had lost interest in the mountain.

He entered the coffee shop quietly, a young man - not more than 22, Jun would say - with small stature, clad in down jacket and blue tattered jeans. He took the seat next to the window, overlooking the forest path. His hand put down a set of keys that gave out muffled tinkling noises. 

Jun watched him since he entered. He had lived there long enough to differ people who visited the area for a short holiday and those who were wishing for a one way trip into the forest. This one looked like the later; coming to the area alone no sign of carrying camera or walking sticks. The man wore a pair of battered red sneakers that despite comfortable to walk on, might be a little too slippery to wear for hiking in the mountain at the end of autumn. 

Jun put the menu before him and noticed how the man pulled back a little as Jun came over. 

“Just coffee,” he mumbled as if he was nervous, “please,” he added. Then he turned his face towards the forest path again. 

“Would you like sugar and cream to it?” Jun asked again, but the man ignored him. His hands were turning around his phone, and he drew his body closer to the window as if telling Jun that, “no, you’re not welcome here. Please go.”

Jun gave his softest smile, “One coffee, then.” 

Jun took his time to grind beans manually and use personal drip to make the coffee instead of taking brewed coffee from the coffee maker. He kept watch of the small man who currently pulled his legs up and hugged them, making a small human bundle by the window.

"If it's cold by the window, come closer to the fireplace," Jun said from where he stood. The coffee shop was empty safe from the two of them. 

He ignored Jun and kept looking out the window towards the forest. 

Jun sighed a bit. Even though he moved there because he wanted to stop anyone who wanted to take that one way walk into the forest, he knew that he was actually hopeless. All this time Masaki was the one who would reach out to people who wandered alone there. Sure, Masaki is very shy with new people, but he opens up to people easily.

He took the freshly brewed coffee and put it together with rusk he made two days ago. Sweets makes people happier, Aiba said, although for Jun, serving coffee with cookies is just a normal practice he learned from visiting various coffee shops. He put a pack of sugar and creamer next to the cup and brought it to the table. 

"He is your coffee," he put the small tray before the small man. The other man looked up and said his thanks. Jun noticed the redness on his eyes and the dark circles. 

He stood still for a while, thinking he should start a conversation, but not sure what to say. 

"The forest looks bare now. It was more colorful last week, but if you go to the gorge, the leaves are still intact. I heard from another visitor yesterday," Jun said in the end, "are you going to hike?"

The man at the table shook his head but said nothing. Jun waited a while.

"If you..." need to talk about anything, you can talk to me, Jun wanted to say, but what came out from his mouth was, "if you need anything, I'll be at the counter."

Jun went back to his counter and continued reading a novel he got from Sho the other day. He used to buy his own book, but after quitting the office and opened the coffee shop, he had to change his lifestyle quite drastically. No more branded goods, for sure, but also no more spare money to buy novels or CD. Thank goodness Sho was also an avid reader and lent him his books from time to time. Caring the coffee shop could be boring when it was not tourist season.

An hour has passed when Jun stole another glance towards his only customer. He was still not moving from his curled position. Coffee almost untouched. 

Jun brewed another cup of coffee and made strawberry jam toast and brought it to the guest. When he was about to put the toast on the table, the guest stirred and stopped his hand.

"I didn't order this," he said.

"It's in the house," Jun insisted.

The guest looked up, eyes rather hollow, but it was because of the dark circles under his eyes. 

"Thank you," he muttered, "but I'm not hungry."

And Jun noticed that he did not even touch the rusk he served. He settled for putting the newly brewed coffee only. 

"At least, let me serve you a new cup of coffee. It's better when it's still warm," he insisted. 

The guest was about to say something, but Jun cut off, "It's a service."

"I... I have to go already, so ...," the guest stood up. Jun watched the small hands collecting the bill and brushed on Jun as he moved towards the cashier. His jacket smelled of tobacco smoke and a hint of alcohol. 

Jun hurried putting down the tray and followed towards the cash register, but the guest already left through the door. On the tray was a ¥500 coin. 

"Wait," Jun went to the door, "your change!" 

But he saw the man entered an SUV and drove off. 

 

Jun could not shake off the customer. Even when he served dinner to some locals that night, he still remembered the way his guest looked out towards the forest. What was he thinking of? he wondered to himself. 

"Any problem?" Sho asked from the counter. Detective Sakurai was the first person Jun ever met in that sleepy town. Apparently he noticed that Jun was drawn into his own thought as he cleaned up for closing. Sho was the last customer he had. Jun even already put the closed sign on the door. 

"Nothing," he said. He then took the empty plate from Sho and proceeded to wash the utensils. "It's already late, Sho-san, you should go back. It's a long drive down." 

Sho lived near the town center, near the town hall, the post office, and Sho's working place, the police station. It was about half an hour drive down the hills. However, as a single man living alone, he ate out every day. Ever since Jun moved in to the town, Sho often came over to have a coffee or eat in between his patrol. 

The policemen took his leave. Jun watched the headlight disappeared at the curve, and as he looked up to his front, looming over the tree tops, Mount Fuji stood proud in its loneliness.


	2. Last Scene

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jun was lying in bed that night. It was past midnight and he just turned off the light when he heard muffled scrunch, scrunch noise from outside. He slowly got up from his bed, threw over his coat and walked down, taking a flashlight that was always hanging by the stair and walked towards the back door of his shop.

Jun was lying in bed that night. It was past midnight and he just turned off the light when he heard muffled scrunch, scrunch noise from outside. He slowly got up from his bed, threw over his coat and walked down, taking a flashlight that was always hanging by the stair and walked towards the back door of his shop.

When he got out from his building, he saw a faint light going deeper the forest trail. 

"Hey," he called, "it's dangerous to go into the forest at night." There were only two possibilities of what kind of people going into that forest at night; the first one would be teenagers and thrill seekers, the second one would be people seeking for final rest in the forest. Judging from where Jun stood, a lone light usually indicated the second one. Thrill seekers usually came with more people. 

The faint light did not seem to hear him, it kept moving further in. Jun dashed into the forest, flashlight wobbling as he ran following the tiny light. 

"Hey," he grabbed the other person by the shoulder and turned him around, "stop. It's dangerous to go there." Jun knew he sounded desperate, but he hated it everytime he joined the sweep and still found dead bodies in the forest. He did not want anyone to feel the way he felt when he came to this town only to find that he....

"It's you," he said when he saw the face of the other person. The young man in the afternoon, still in his down jacket, tattered blue jeans, and red sneakers. 

"Let me go," the man said, despite not moving, his voice was a whisper. 

Jun loosened his grab from the other's shoulders. "I'm sorry," he said, "Please don't go into the forest at night. It's dangerous. Come, let's go to my coffee shop, we can have some drink...."

He waited, expecting the other to say yes. If it was during the day, he would walk together into the forest and talk, and maybe he could help by listening. But it was past midnight. He was not like Satoshi who knew the forest so well, he could walk outside the forest path and still found his way back.

The young man strayed his eyes from Jun's and looked into the dark of the forest. On the opposite direction, Jun could still see his house faintly among the trees. 

"... see ... I just want to see...," the young man said, his eyes looked forlorn.

"Not now," Jun softened his tone and grabbed the other's hands. They were so small and cold compared to Jun's. 

He turned his eyes towards Jun, then he nodded slowly.

"Let's go," Jun slowly took the smaller man back to the forest fringe. 

 

It was when he had seated the young man by the fire place and proceeded to make coffee that he realized his hands were shaking. He spilled some coffee when he filled the filter of his coffee machine. 

Jun took some sugar rusk into a small plate and brought it with two cups of coffee to where the young man was and seated himself next to him, facing the glowing ember of the fireplace. 

"Please," he said as he pushed one cup of coffee towards the other person. 

"I'm Jun," he started again after the young man took the cup into his hands and took a sip. He waited if the other one would say something, but seeing no reply was given, he continued, "I'm sorry I stopped you from going there. I just...."

"I have no intention to die, if that's what you think," the other one cut off. His voice was quiet. 

Jun was rather annoyed, he was tired and sleepy. "Look," he said, "going into the forest at night is already a bad idea. People get lost easily there," he paused and pointed towards the sneakers, "and wearing that is suicidal!"

The other person was taken aback. He looked away from Jun, staring into his black coffee. 

"I'm sorry," Jun started again, keeping his voice low and even, "it's just that...."

"It's not your fault," the other one said. Jun waited until the other continued. 

"I really just want to see how that place looks like at night. Nothing more. I thought I'll go out again in the morning," he sighed, "maybe you're right, the shoes are a bit suicidal. I was thinking more of getting a good GPS system. Right. I'm sorry. Maybe I should have gotten a satellite phone too."

Jun gaped in disbelief. What? GPS system? Satellite phone? Huh? 

The other guy laughed awkwardly. "Is it weird?" He hid his face with his hands. "It is, right? I just thought, trees might interfere normal GPS system, but if I get the professional one, then the accuracy would be fine. I put all the forest path data in already. I don't think I would get lost. I went there to readjust my setting, and everything worked well. It's so simple, just wait until late, go there at night, stay, and leave the next morning. I just want to...."

Jun did not know why, but he pulled the other one into his embrace. There was a stretch of silence until the other one talked again.

"I just want to see the place where he died," came the voice, slower this time, and there was a hitch in between. 

"I don't understand," he continued again, "we promised to team up and destroy Perpetua, but he just never came up... He never replied my mails, and then," a pause, "then I heard that he...."

Jun understood there. The way the young man looked when he was looking out to the forest, the reason why he came, it was the same as Jun. He wanted to understand. Someone left him and he wanted to understand why. He tightened his hug and the other man broke into tears.


	3. Under the lone oak tree

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "How did he look like when he died?"
> 
> Satoshi looked up to Nino and found him curled himself, hugging tightly around his knees, small hands clasped together.
> 
> "Are you sure you wanna know?"
> 
> "Yes." The answer came out in a tone that showed certainty.

Later when the man calmed down, Jun learned that his name was Ninomiya Kazunari, Nino for short. Surprisingly he was the same age as Jun, despite the look and posture. He lived in Tokyo, practically not going out of his house unless really necessary. He got everything he needed through online shops and delivery, he said, and he worked at home. He spent his spare time playing games.

Nino said he was visiting a friend. Jun knew well that he meant visiting the place where a friend departed. Without being asked, Nino stressed that he had friends despite living an antisocial life by normal standard. Most of them he only knew by handle names or a list of aliases in the internet. Many of them were faceless, known only by user pics. A very, very little number of them, he knew them by faces, stories of life, blog posts from blogs that had very low traffic, and random chats about life. "Because opening up to other people without face is easier to some people," he explained, because Jun was the type who prefered traditional acquaintance, not virtual ones. 

"I just want to see the scenery he saw for the last time," he admitted after telling Jun about his friend, “Sora” - Jun put apostrophe on the name because it was not even his real name - who took his life in that forest five months ago. 

Jun remembered this “Sora”. Jun never saw the body, despite he helped bringing tools from his house. The boy was found at the bottom of a valley, under the lone oak tree, near a small stream. Judging from the way his body twisted into a messy lump, he must have fallen from top of the cliff, into the forms of rocks in the bottom of the valley. It was not easy to fetch the body because it was rainy season and the rocks could not be reached from the stream. In his pocket, they found his ID card and a suicide letter, turning the probability of death by accident into nill. They managed to send the remains back to his family, a father who showed shame on his face and a mother who kept crying - so Sho said when he got drunk some days after. “Sora” was only 21 when he died. 

“Stay here tonight,” Jun told Nino, “There’s an extra room upstairs. I'll introduce you to someone tomorrow. He might be able to help you."

Jun took Nino to the upper floor. There were three rooms. The nearest one from the stairs was Masaki's, the furthest one was Jun's. Nino was taken to the room in the middle, an empty Japanese style room, except from a calligraphy scroll with 楽 - joy - hanging above the door. It was written in the shape of dancing man. Nino noticed the scroll was signed by Ohno Satoshi. 

"I'll get the futon and spare clothes," Jun said and went out from the sliding doors that connected to his room. 

Nino could see Jun's room from where he sat, a bare room safe from a sofa bed, carpet, and a reading lamp. The room was accented by royal purple of the carpet and the pillows, other than that, everything was on the lighter shade of wooden colors. 

Jun took spare futon from the storage under his sofa bed. "Would you like to take shower? I'll warm up the water." Jun disappeared to the bathroom and when he appeared again, he proceeded on taking a pair of pajama and a towel from his closet and handed them to Nino.

"I'm sorry that I can't draw new water for you," Jun said. According to manner, guest should get the bathtub first and use new water, but this was unexpected and Jun did not have that much to spare for water and gas bill. 

Nino gave an understanding nod and went to the bathroom. There was a window on the wall that was slightly open for ventilation. Nino took a peek outside and was greeted by dark treetops and the hillside where the coffee shop was located. Down the window he could see the forest path in the dark. If he followed that road, it would reach to....

"Ninomiya-san," a knock at the bathroom door, "I forgot that the soap bottle is almost empty. I'm bringing in the refill."

Nino opened the door and received the plastic soap bag from the house owner. He noticed Jun's eyes darted at the window for a split second before resting on him again. 

"You can close the window if it's cold," he said. 

"Don't worry," Nino answered, "I'm not going to jump out the window. I left my down jacket in the room." 

Jun scoffed but grinned nonetheless, "Right. Good to know."

That night Nino slept facing the window that looked towards the looming peak of Mount Fuji. 

 

Nino woke up to the sound of curses from downstairs. Groggily he went down to find Jun cursing over a coffee bag that refused to open. He stopped by the stairs and watched Jun for a while before he stepped into the counter, took a scissor and offered it to Jun. 

"You know, inventions are made to make people's life easier," Nino smirked as he noticed Jun was more or less a lump of mess in the morning with thick glasses, messy hair, and half blanket thrown over his pajama. 

"Thanks," Jun took the scissor and opened the coffee bag. 

"Do you always open the shop in that condition?" Nino asked, "such a surprise that this shop can last for two years." 

Jun rolled his eyes, "I told you I will introduce you to someone. He's outside, taking his horse away from the road."

At that time the door opened and chimed happily. A tanned man entered the shop and went straight to the counter. In his hands was a basket of fresh vegetables that he put on the countertop. He looked at Nino for a moment and then looked at Jun. "This guy?" the man asked. 

Jun nodded. He prepared hot coffee while introducing the two. Nino learned that the man was the person who wrote the dancing joy calligraphy in the room where he slept. He's the only son of a farmer on the other side of the mountain, supplier of vegetables for Jun's shop, and he often moved around by horse, because horses can take shortcut through the mountains. Satoshi learned about Nino, a tokyoite who wanted to get to the bottom of the lonely oak tree, and apparently the same age as Jun. 

"Keep this a secret from Sho-san," Jun said, "he won't like it."

Satoshi gave out a tsk, "he didn't like anything that is outside norm anyway. I'll see you on the evening then," he told Nino, "get better shoes. I don't trust city people to roam around in the mountain unprepared. They usually end up injured or dead."

 

Satoshi came back in the evening just before sunset. He did not have his horse with him, he was walking from the nearest bus stop, about twenty minutes walk downhill from there. "I don't want Ao-chan to stay the night here," he told Jun. Ao-chan was Satoshi's ride.

Nino borrowed Jun's hiking shoes. It's half a size too big for Nino, but Jun lent very thick socks to make them fit better. He also had his bag refilled with water and given a tin bento box of curry. He quietly followed Satoshi up the trail with Jun watching from his back door. 

"I'll prepare breakfast for tomorrow, be sure to come back," Jun said, while Nino answered with a nod and Satoshi told Jun to prepare japanese style breakfast for him as a payment with miso soup, dried seaweed, and raw egg on rice. 

The two of them walked the first one hour without talk. Satoshi was singing some matsuri songs that Nino thought had heard somewhere but dismissed because for him all festival songs are just the same. 

"We go up from here," Satoshi suddenly stopped and pointed along the river when they crossed a small bridge. 

"Eh?"

"You want to go to the bottom of the lonely oak, right? It's easier to reach there if we follow the river. It's also safer because it's going to be dark soon," Satoshi reasoned as he jumped over the bridge and landed on a rock by the river. 

"Come on," he said to Nino.

Nino followed Satoshi and walked the narrow dry area between the growth and the water flow. It was proven difficult for Nino because they only have light from their flashlights since the sky had turned completely dark and the ground they walked on was uneven and slippery. Before Nino, Satoshi walked calmly as if it were paved footpath. 

"You really know where you're going, don't you?" Nino commented in between his huffy breaths. He regretted did not like physical activities and skipped the gym even though he had free membership. 

"I told you, this is my playground," Satoshi answered, voice even as if the climb did not strain him. "The villagers said maybe I was possessed by the forest spirit because I was lost for several days here when I was a child."

"Oh, but you made it out alive?" Nino tried to maintain his balance while walking on the muddy ground.

"Yeah. But as long as you don't hurt yourself and you don't meet wild animals or be hypothermic, then you can survive here. There are plenty of food and water."

Nino gave out a whistle. 

"They found me half conscious though, some 30 km away from the gorge, already in the neighboring prefecture." Satoshi shrugged, "but I learned my way ever since. After 20 years going in and out of this forest, you'll get the hang of it."

"Oh. I was hoping that the possessed part was true."

"As if.... But many people got lost if they stray from the road or the river," Satoshi was quiet when he said, "even if you follow the path, sometimes you can still got hurt." He looked back, pausing and indicated to Nino's shoes, "most of those who got injured are the ones coming unprepared." 

Nino ducked his face, "I'm sorry." It was then that he noticed that Satoshi was wearing a pair of old sneakers, but judging how easy Satoshi looked when he hiked up the stream, Nino knew that perhaps Satoshi could have worn a pair of straw sandals and still moved easily there. 

"It's only about another hour and we will arrive in our destination." Satoshi threw a smug grin, "if we keep this pace, that is."

 

They arrived about three hours after sunset. It was a small clearing under the valley with steep cliffs on both sides. Rock formations filled most part of the clearing. The part nearest to the cliff were jagged on the upper part, but soft on the bottom part due to erosion. The ones near the water were smooth and round.

"Water goes up here during rainy season," Satoshi gestured on markings on the stone. "It's dry now, so we can hike along the river. On rainy season, the only way to go down here is to climb down this cliff."

Nino gave a nod. "Where was he found?" He looked up and saw an old oak tree on the top of the cliff, a little away from the rest of the trees.

Satoshi walked to the edge and climbed up the jagged stone formation. "Here," he looked up, "it's 12 meters down from there, 16 if you climb up the tree. You won't stand a chance, if you fall head-first...," he looked back to Nino, "I don't like talking about this. Too many deaths in this forest."

"I'm sorry," Nino mumbled, for dragging you here and give you trouble, he wanted to say, but he stopped at the apology.

Satoshi sighed, "wanna come up here?" He extended his hand towards Nino who reached up and took the help. 

The rock was narrow, but big enough for both of them to sit. 

"I'm hungry," Satoshi suddenly quipped. He took opened his bag and took out a box he received from Jun before going. A token of gratitude, Jun told him, for taking Nino to this place. 

Nino let the man eat while he looked around the stone using his flashlight. There were dark patches on the stone, and he felt a little sick thinking that they might be dried blood.

"We cleaned up the area, you know," Satoshi said, "you won't see any signs of...."

"Were you there?" Nino asked. He put his legs up and hugged his knees. He knew this place would scare him, but he just wanted to know. After all, he had to admit that Sora was close enough to him to reveal each other's real names and even knew each others' real face. 

"Yeah, was there when Hongo-san was found." Satoshi put down his spoon and closed the lid of his bento box. "Kokubun-san saw him from the other side of the river. I was sweeping this side, but it's rather hard to look down from up there." He paused and took a deep breath. "Sho-chan, I mean, Detective Sakurai was with me, but he's so bad with heights, so I was the one checking." 

"How did he look like when he died?"

Satoshi looked up to Nino and found him curled himself, hugging tightly around his knees, small hands clasped together.

"Are you sure you wanna know?"

"Yes." The answer came out in a tone that showed certainty.

"You're really bothersome," he grunted. "Alright then, put away your bag," Satoshi stood up, throwing his bag and Nino's on another rock higher than where they were. He pulled Nino up and told him to lie down. 

"It's impossible to get that position and still be alive, but he was looking up there. His neck was broken and it was twisted in a weird way and then his legs were like this." He did not explain how the skull split, how the bones cracked through the skin, and how much blood was there. It was an ugly sight. Satoshi quietly positioned Nino to spread on the stone, making him lie on his back. "He fell head-first, even if he survived the crash, he wouldn't last long." 

Satoshi turned off Nino's flashlight. "I'll leave you here for a while. I think you need it." He took both bags with him and went a bit further up the stream and turned off his flashlight too. 

Nino stayed lying down on the rock despite the cold, looking up to a long stretch stars framed by the cliff. Above him, a lone oak overshadowed. Maybe he could be in peace with the loss. There were still many questions unanswered, but those questions were better left unasked. 

A little further away, he heard Satoshi starting to hum folk song about the forest.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading ^____^
> 
> I changed my mind during the last minutes and put Hongo as Sora's real name. I was thinking of making up an OC, but I think for further possible stories, and decided upon Hongo Kanata, both of his characters when he collaborated with Nino made me chose him. 
> 
> So far Aiba was not mentioned in the series. I actually wrote Aiba's story before writing on this one, but it did not satisfy me yet.

**Author's Note:**

> I sketched the coffee shop, in case you are interested.  
> It's [here](http://mywasteddream.livejournal.com/5050.html).


End file.
